Jesus says:
“It is not an optical illusion. You really see - shining on the agonizing, bloody face of your Jesus in Gethsemane - the smile that flourished there when the angel of God brought into the darkness enveloping Me entirely a supersubstantial light, which allowed Me to see the faces of those who would love Me in the future ages.
“The chalice of comfort, the metaphorical chalice given by the angel to my spirit, poisoned with the chalice of expiation,693 was nothing but the future illumination of all the good my death would occasion, opposed to all the evil my death would not overcome, and of all the hearts that would love Me. Then a smile blossomed over the tears; a security descended upon the anguish. Sacrifice, while remaining tremendous, becomes bearable when one knows that it is useful. I now knew this. And I smiled at this knowledge.
“I also saw you, little John.... I shall now show you the smile at that time to bring you comfort.”
My Note
Just as fifteen days ago, while looking at the card for my inclusion in the Servants of Mary, which you gave me, I have seen such a beautiful, beautiful smile flowering on Jesus’ face in the Garden! The face becomes luminous. It seems to be saying, “I am happy!” and smiling at a secret interlocutor - perhaps his own self - to whom it is sweet to convey, as to a faithful companion, after the anguish of being convinced that the sacrifice was so useless, the peace of his conviction that the sacrifice was useful. And I, looking at Him, said to myself, “What tricks sight plays! Why, here I’m seeing Jesus smile at this moment of agony!” But do you see how Jesus responds? I am not deceived, then!
Blessed be He for that smile, for... I really can’t take any more... and if I were to say what’s blaring inside... I would disobey you and the advice of the Mother. I am thus silent. But silence does not mean choking off those voices. They cannot be choked off, for every minute, with its physical sufferings, with its moral void, and with the increasingly intense need to have you close to my dying, makes them emerge again.
Ah, Lord...!
693 Luke 22:43.